MAY THiRTEENTH – so much significance

today is a BiG day!

and i’ll give you THREE REASONS why:

1. i have the greatest mother in the world. er, universe. er, just don’t try to compete – ok?!

this is her. yvonne. reading her scrips waiting for one of our many trains in italy.

…ok, i have much better pictures, yes. but i thought this one had a nice “vibe” to it. ha!

so why don’t we go back a bit?? my parents on their wedding day!… classic…

four kids later along came her favorite (moi!)…yes, i’m like a little elf…

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you can always find my mom in the yard with her flowers and plants. i often shadowed her…

(pic with the first bloomed tigerlily!!! a native to the northern mexican mountain where my mom grew up):

always supportive…so happy on my temple endowment day back in 2008!…

mom wrote me a handwritten letter every week, without fail, the whole 18 months i was gone on my mission. that mail was the best.

mom and her parents (grandma! – another amazing woman to be mentioned on this day!)…

random. dressed up as cinderelly….super cute, i know…

mom and i tend to go out to eat….and eat a lot when we do…

…which is why we were in heaven when we went to Italy together in january…

(all sorts of flattering pictures, i know!)

enough with photos… my mom is incredible. as i get older, i have the opposite of worry when i see more of her in me. she’s been an example my whole life of hard work, sacrifice, faith, service, and integrity…also distilling in me a love for the arts, music, gardening, cooking, cleaning, and giving. she’s demonstrated to me that the gospel is a way of life and that we should live putting others first.

i can’t even begin really to know what to say when it comes to my mom…

so let’s settle with, Happy Mother’s Day! – te amo un montonsote!

REASON #2 for May 13th

2. i returned home from my mission TWO YEARS AGO today!

holy moly!

yes, that dates me…

though my 18 months spent in the service of the Lord are ones i will never take back and will remember forever. puerto rico and barbados…always in my heart.

i miss them…

…two years ago on Mother’s Day this happened. the best last Sunday any missionary could ask for.

ohmygoodness i’m getting emotional thinking about these people…i must call them…

moving on…

REASON #3 for May 13th…

3.

i’m not one to keep track of dates…but this time i will make note that the 13th marks “one month” of being “officially together”

cheesey?? …you’re just jealous.

a little crazy that after only 6 1/2 weeks of dating, i’m incredibly head-over-heels for this face…

WOAH there, huge zoomed in shot of a face!!!

bahahahahaha

only appropriate though. super cute, right?!

oh…that’s james, btw. get used to hearing about him.

and we’re a pretty big deal.

the talk of the town one might say…

yes…we cook together too.

the only problem…

i have to wait FOUR  M O R E   W  E   E   K   S   until i see him again. siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh…

more on this later.

love, whit

Mail in March – i’ll be your penpal

i would venture to guess that most of society today knows the feeling of checking your email to only find lame SPAM. or even logging onto facebook and having no messages or notifications really worth getting excited over. ugh. i hate that too. BUT – you may also know the excitement of finding quality emails from friends or family. maybe even some pictures! or that day you log on to facebook and feel thrilled to see high numbers up in the left corner – the anticipation of clicking to see who wrote on your wall or left you a message. or in the blogging world, finding many comments left from your readers, your friends. let’s face it – people love that!!! we all like feeling loved – to know someone took a few minutes in their day to think of you. actually, in essence, i believe we live for it in a way. human interaction and communication. building and having friendships. relationships.

what am i getting at??!

facebook, blogging, and the internet ASIDE – let’s talk about the hand-written letter. this is something that warms my soul more than any other correspondence (other than face to face). THAT is something that makes my day. tangible, homemade, hand-written, personal – just the concept of the time it takes to send something of that nature – - – it speaks volumes. it is special. and, unfortunately in this day-in-age, it is unique and rare. but it doesn’t have to be! in fact, i wish it wasn’t.

i’ve always loved sending mail. i love crafting together cards, letters, and envelopes. i love preparing packages and send them with anticipation wondering about when it will arrive and if it will bring a smile to the face of the recipient. i enjoy sending because i absolutely LOVE receiving…and wish the world wouldn’t forget the value of such a simple thing.

my fellow blogger, Cassie, at Books and Bowel Movements (love her blog!) has inspired me to take on a challenge: A Month of Letters!

the challenge is to mail 31 letters. they will be hand-written, home-made, personal and all with the “whit touch”. (ohmygoodness who wouldn’t want one of those?!!?) i think it’d be rad if i had 31 different people to write to. old or NEW friends! SO…

here’s my offer, if you’d like to help me in my ambitions, for one of my envelopes or parcels to make it your mailbox, or simply to become my penpal- you can e-mail me your address! i love getting to know people better and forming new friendships…what better way than through mail?! i think it will be a beautiful experience. and very much something to look forward to when walking to the mailbox every day. i’ve been thinking something like this would be a fun idea ever since i saw a fellow blog friend do a Christmas Card swap with her readers (nicole and her precious puggle can be found here)

yes, some of you may be thinking it’s a bit sketchy to give your address away to me (especially if you don’t know me too well). but i assure you, i am no creep. i will not stalk you or sell your information. haha! you must know me somewhat anyhow if you are here perusing my blog. however, it is clearly your decision.

if you’d like to send me your address, do so at my email:    whitney[DOT]tutt[AT]gmail[DOT]com

march is here soon!!!

love, whit

 

stress. what’s my deal?!

have you ever had those days..weeks..MONTHS where you just can’t feel at EASE??!

i mean, yeah…we all stress out now and again. if you don’t ever, i’m envious, PLEASE tell how you manage that!!? i stress more than i should anyway. i over-analyze and over think and turn little things into a BIG DEAL. in a nutshell – i’m female. and i have a slight inkling that some of it’s genetic…am i blaming my mother? not necessarily…but half of my “being” comes from her…and if you knew her, you’d see why i reason this way.

point being: if it’s not one thing – it’s another. and sometimes i’ll go DAYS feeling on edge or just like there is something looming in my life that doesn’t allow me to be fully at peace … and i won’t even know what that is!! so i have to actually take a time-out to stop and analyze my life to see WHAT it is that’s somehow, in the back of my mind, stressing me out.

and sometimes it’s something SO SILLY!!!

anyway…i’m feeling that now. the past few days i’m just TIRED all the time, yet i sleep plenty at night. i haven’t been to the gym in 11 days…yes, i went to Utah AND i’ve been sick. but still. that’s always a good “out” for me and relaxes me. i have headaches. even though i’m tired, my mind is just antsy and cannot focus – it flits from one thing to another. nothing sounds good to eat, i’m getting a picky palate. i’m irritable. i’m ok – i mean, lately i feel TERRIBLY blessed and happy about things….but at the same time, stressed and irritable about so much.

i’m at the point of having to write it all out. put in little simple baby steps what i need to do to “lighten my load”. which to some, probably isn’t EVEN a load.

so this is me, trying to figure out my stress sources right now:

1 – i’m suddenly feeling compelled to, yet again, change my life plans. this item alone has A LOT of sub-categories to it that i won’t go into now.

2 – i’ve realized my Italy trip is only less than 6 weeks away and i haven’t booked/purchased ANYTHING apart from my flight – rail passes, hotels, mini-tours, other passes/events, airport transportation and other things… which entails finalizing the itinerary and how long will be spent in each city and in what order. i have a good idea, just need to sit down and DO it.

3 – upcoming school plans for 2012.

4 – finances. my budget. i’m not in debt at all, i’m actually completely paid off in student loans and everything…but i still worry about how much i’m saving/spending. and about the things i’m saving up for. and the fact that i don’t have a retirement plan yet or any sort of account with compound interest.

5 – keeping in touch with people. a lot of people from my mission. or even other friends… i get easily stressed about overdue phone calls/emails/texts or my delay/lack in responding to them. i’m not good at that.

6 – whenever i have upcoming “photography gigs” (which i LOVE!) i always stress beforehand about lighting and how they’ll turn out. i can’t help it. it’s like i always second guess myself that i even know what i’m doing. that stupid voice in my head that i wish i could slaughter. and yes, i have some coming up.

7 – i have some relationships in my life that now and again pop into my day and overly stress me. and i worry about my relationships with people, how i treat them, the things i say, how i react to how they treat me, when it’s OK to let go and move on.

8 – all the little things i like/want/need to do that aren’t stressful but sit in the back of my head and end up unintentionally making me feel like i’m not getting things done…..like the 5 books i’ve started to read and haven’t finished, and the 6 others i’ve bought and haven’t started. the fact that i haven’t been to the gym in so long or to Zumba class. i’ll be SO ready for bed and it’s late when i realize i haven’t read my scriptures or done anything that day of the sort. i have unfinished paintings, i have unfinished projects- a stack of picture frames i bought for my room still sit on the floor next to my desk because i can’t decide how to utilize them/place them on my wall. i always feel i need to draw/paint more to develop my skills. i always remember i don’t practice the piano hardly…ever.

9 – though i’m rather content with it…the fact that i don’t exactly have close friends here or ever even care to socialize…in essence, bothers me.

10 – being too tired sometimes to do any of the above.

11 – bad hair days. bad face days.

12 – my age.

13 – the economy.

14 – whether or not i’m doing the right thing with my life.

15 – lately, mingling. i won’t even bother explaining. haha.

well, i think that about covers everything that is stuck in the back of my head. i understand that having “things to do” is a normal aspect of life. but sometimes…the list gets longer than i’d like. and…stresses me out. HA! go figure.

i’m a mess! i know. whatever.

once i start checking things off…i can rest easier.

this is a step in the right direction i suppose.

love, whit

please?

i just have to mention that men look SO ATTRACTIVE in ties. and vests. and sweaters.

*SWOON*

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one day, yes, one day…i will find my man.

it’d be an extra perk if he had impeccable taste and style.

but i guess mostly i’m waiting for that guy that makes me feel like he can’t live without me, that i’m the most beautiful thing in his life, and that will love me even though i ramble and lose my mind sometimes.

oh, and can he also be very thoughtful?! you know, do little things for no reason.

the little things mean a lot.

and can he please not live miles away?? i’d like to have someone to spend my weekends with. or even my week nights.

…and not be a terribly picky eater…because i’m kind of a foodie. heh

one more thing…know the difference between YOUR and YOU’RE.

is that too much to ask?

thanks.

love, whit

The Beatles were right…

i have come to the conclusion that The Beatles were right – love is all you need – or, all you need is love!

yes, the world has so much to offer, but #1- are things of this world REALLY that important because #2 – there’s something far greater than this world. and i do believe that love will get us the second and make the first more worthwhile.

everybody, whether they like to admit it or not, lives to love and be loved. we could even say that we live because we are loved…

i mean, look at where it all started. love first came from our Father in heaven who created us – and put us here in this life to learn something. that thing is love.

like everything else in life, love is a choice. and i…choose love.

why? it makes everything better!

love understands imperfection. love will make me kind, even if a person is entirely rude to me.

love will make me patient and caring. love will teach me to sacrifice and to give. love will make my life no longer be about me.

love is the over-powering SUPERNOVA of all emotions. it really is! where there’s love, there’s also hope. love overrides bitterness and anger. love brings peace and joy. love has perspective and can see beyond the surface – beyond that superficial and trivial stuff.

i don’t know who said, but i read it somewhere and really like it, “too often we waste time looking for a perfect lover instead of creating a perfect love.” – SO true.

but apart from that MUSHY-GUSHY love stuff is the other love that makes every day great.

like a love to LEARN and CRAVE NEW THINGS – to set goals and go for them. to make the most of situations and time. right now, i couldn’t be MORE ecstatic about planning my Europe trip. to travel. to experience. to enjoy the life i have.

i choose love because it lets me appreciate. appreciate little things – everyday mundane things. places. people. friendships.

i LOVE friendships. the conversations. the company. the goodness in them. just this weekend i was talking to a friend about how, for a long time there, i hadn’t felt like myself…he mentioned that for a while i used to argue with him a lot about petty things. i felt horrible and apologized, yet he giggled and said, “it’s ok whitney, i’m in it for the long haul.”

i feel really blessed to have a handful of people like that in my life. people who accept me even when i’m crazy or at my crappiest. and i want to be a person that can love people even when they treat me crappy, too. we all have our down moments. regardless, you know what they say, “an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.” so i refuse to play that game. make the world a better place, yah know?

i guess what i’m trying to say is – that’s the attitude of love. throwing out the bad and embracing the good.

and then, even the little things. i mean, the really little things that i love give life an extra bit of joy.

like, for instance, these shoes…and those tights! they make me so happy, in a way that only some may comprehend

or the love of creating. that gratification of making something useful or pretty. or maybe just to let out a little inner satisfaction. …

ie: i’m going to have to do this in the upcoming month – LOVE it! …

or you know the goodness you feel when you eat something you absolutely LOVE? haha…i feel that. asian lettuce wraps, among other things, do that to me…

i also love browsing through book stores, painting my nails, and growing a garden. and photography. i LOVE photography. so why not go back to school and get a degree in it? well, i’m going to. can’t wait!

find what you love – and do it.

maybe i am just a cheesy/crazy “peace, love, & flowers” kind of girl … but, i truly believe that love – in ALL of it’s finest forms – is all you need. so go get some!

[ i did not mention it entirely, but looking at that first and great commandment to "love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, might, mind, and strength" and then to "love thy neighbor as thyself" would, in a nutshell - if done correctly, encompass everything and accomplish all of what i've been saying...but...instead of raving about that and how it works for who knows how long, i'll just throw it in here at the end ]

love, whit

the weekend

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my weekend had me thinking about a few things.

1. in the words of justin bieber, “never say never”  (great documentary, bee-tee-dub) – life has curve balls. plans can change. time will make things happen that you might have never anticipated…i mean, five years ago had i been asked that infamous question, “where do you see yourself in five years?” – this is not entirely what i would have pictured…

…so,

2. prepare. to take on whatever. go forward with faith. no, maybe you don’t have all the answers, and things are unsure – but go forward anyway.

3. TiME. time does so much to a person. a relationship. a block of cheese. it takes times for something to be ripe enough for the picking, but with time, the same thing can also go rotten. i may be only 24 – but sometimes i feel like i’m ALREADY 24. time is slipping away. things need to happen! i feel behind. stuck. as though i’m on pause but the world around me and the clock keep ticking. i get anxious and frustrated. then i have CARPE DIEM moments of caring less about any time-table other than fitting in as much as i can and enjoying life while i am still young and single and life is full of options and opportunities. i guess regardless… time: don’t waste it.

ps – i’m SO ready for full-time school again in january.

again, go forward.

i guess my #3 really goes with #1…and #2. whatevs.

4. thanks to a great lesson in sunday school – the Lord’s wisdom and the world’s wisdom are not the same. a reminder of the constant need to re-evaluate priorities, what’s most important, and my motives.

5. maybe North Point is a good idea. (Paige, if you read this, let’s not jump the gun though)

6. i’m glad i called elissa

7. two words – apple festival

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caramel apple cheesecake bars

um, YES!

love, whit

things i know for certain

you can go anywhere.

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you don’t know everything. remember that.

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it’s true. each decision we make falls under one or the other. there really is no gray area. and those decisions make up the person you have become.

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there’s something bigger and greater than us all.

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great things come by work and sacrifice.

love is a great thing.

learning to love matters most.

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no matter how bad it gets, you are blessed.

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the truth about people and their priorities,

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what you do does have an affect.

love, whit

share a little love today

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sometimes i just feel terribly selfish.

i’m not a bad person. but sometimes i get to thinking about life. this life’s purpose. MY life. and how i’m living it. and then i start to feel like a bad person.

i’m a strong believer that this life is meant to be lived for others and that is when we discover ourselves and find true joy. it’s about love. the kind of love that makes you look at a stranger and see them for who they really are – someone just like you – a child of God – and love them because of it. the kind of love that doesn’t judge or hate. but forgives and extends compassion. the kind of love that genuinely puts other’s happiness before your own.

i KNOW that when we do something for someone else or focus on helping other people with their problems, we forget our own. we become happy. i’ve experienced it in my own life.

i enjoy “giving”, i do. it brings those warm fuzzies that can be contagious. but to GIVE – it’s not necessarily just the giving, but the WAY or attitude in which it’s done. selfless motives. and often the most important giving aren’t of the material things, but of the self. giving of your time, talents, efforts for a greater good. and doing it because you actually CARE – there’s heart and soul in it. then it becomes beneficial to both the receiver and giver.

so yeah, sometimes i feel terribly selfish. thinking i spend too much of my life dwelling on myself. like a useless pity-party. or wrapped up in strictly selfish gain. never noticing what or who is around me because i’m too caught up in ME. that’s the recipe for crappy days and bad moods.

i get to thinking how much time and money and effort i waste in things that really don’t have value. or lasting value. if we had an earthquake here…or economic crisis…and lost our home, job, and belongings – what would we have to show for our lives? did we build meaningful relationships with others? did we really make a difference? or just squander away our days with selfishness and things that only bring temporary happiness?

you know, it’s already september. time flies. it turns into years. it turns into our life. so much can be accomplished – or so much can be wasted.

in the end, what matters most, you know?

love, whit

beauty is in all of it

life is in the little things. the people in your path. how they are. how they alter your life – if even slightly. i think beauty is a feeling we can find in everything. if we take time to look for it.